You got to have dreams...

Tuesday 23 April 2013

Ok, so I found out this blepharitis eye infection thing is a chronic condition and there's no cure. So once you've had it, it becomes a recurrent problem. Great because I need another chronic thing in my life!!!! Arrrgh.

What is the deal with my body? It actually hates me. My own body hates me! Its like, 'Hmm which way can we destroy Faye today?'

I'm still experiencing headaches and when I told the doctor yesterday guess what he said? The usual, 'Oh, is there something bothering you?', 'Are you depressed?'

No! I'm not fecking depressed! How many times do I have to tell these douche doctors? Ahhh! I asked him to arrange for me to be seen by my Lupus doctor asap as I've never really had headaches before and they were quite severe last week so I'd like to be seen. Its also a coincidence that I started getting them when I increased my steroid dose. The doctor I saw said steroids don't cause migraines yet the lupus nurse told me they can. So I believe her more. I'm so fed up of shitey doctors. I basically have to work things out myself. All they ever want to say to you is you must be depressed. Its so frustrating. I'm not depressed, I have lupus! Do your job and learn about it!

Something that does actually make me depressed is the fact that I can't wear eye make-up at the moment. This is not good. I look like a boiled egg with no eye make up. An actual egg.

which one is which??

I am not one of these natural beauties, I mean, I scrub up OK with the right products but pre-product I look like a 9 year old German boy. (My nan was a little bit German so I guess this is where it comes from) I have blonde eyelashes and brows and red, blotchy skin. Plus dark circles under my eyes. I'm lucky in that I'm not spotty but I can't do the 'au natural' thing.

Anyway so yeah, I am depressed about having to go out like an egg/9 year old boy. Maybe I should have said that to the douche I mean Doctor. Haha, I'd love to have seen his little befuddled face.

I'm writing this whilst watching Made in Chelsea. They annoy the shite out of me. I don't know why I watch this every week. And every single week I end up annoyed, going to bed angry. The only one I like is Francis. He reminds me of Sami for some reason.

When I first started doing this blog I thought I'd update maybe once or twice a week but since doing it I've written everyday. I'm kind of addicted. It's like my on-line (and very public) diary. I just have so much to say! Who knew? When I do something I have to go all out. I can't just start something and not finish it. I knew I'd get addicted to this. But hey, it's not a bad a addiction. Could be worse. Could be crack cocaine or something.

I hope one day this blog becomes so popular that I end up on Oprah...I've always wanted to go on Oprah but I've never had a reason....

'Today on Oprah, we talk to an amazing, wonderful (and beautiful*) girl who wrote a blog that inspired so many others like her...and here she is to share her wisdom...'