23 May 2013

Dear Lupus

This is my letter to lupus....

Dear Lupus,

You have destroyed my previously perfect life. On occasions you have destroyed my soul and you have ravaged my body and mind. I've given up my job and sometimes my freedom for you. You are relentless in your quest to ruin my body, my life and everything in it.

I am pretty sure I don't deserve the pain you have unleashed on me.  Because of you I have questioned whether or not I can go on and continue to exist like this. Because of you I have cried for hours and felt helpless. Because of you I have caused my friends and family to worry about my well-being. Because of you I have wasted days and days asleep. Days I will never get back.

The pain you have caused me to feel is inhumane. You have cause me pain on a daily basis for almost 3 years and my physical pain has sometimes turned to mental pain. Its like a form of torture. I fight with my mind, trying to stay strong and positive, trying to do all the things I used to enjoy doing. But no, because of you I am not always able to. 

You have tried to destroy my body and my soul but let me tell you, you will not destroy my spirit. NEVER. Because of you, I have found strength I never even knew existed. I have found positive thoughts in negative situations and discovered a new sense of humour.  Because of you I have a whole new perspective on life. I have found a light inside me on my darkest days. Because of you I am a survivor and for that Lupus, I thank you. You can try to beat me but unfortunately for you, you're not gonna win so bring it on, Bitch.

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