24 Mar 2013

Flare up time baby

Sunday 24 March - Flare up time

Christ on a bike! I am writing this whilst in bed as I am in a lot of pain of today.   Shit bitch its bad today.

I had a great day yesterday, one of my best friends, Lexie came over and we went out for dinner.  It was lovely and chilled and we had a really nice evening.  I got home a little after 10 and went to bed about 12 - I was absolutely fine all day until I got into bed.  

Desert last night....mmmmm

The pain came out of nowhere - I had really sharp, shooting pains going down my legs and into my feet, my head was pounding and my muscles violently spasming.  Sami was asleep so I just laid there pathetically whimpering.  I considered taking pain killers but I take so many tablets everyday that I usually reserve them for when the pain is really severe.  I managed to get to sleep but I've probably had about 2 hours.  The pain was waking me up and the night sweats were pretty bad.  Its very strange because I don't sweat or get hot in the day, it's only when I sleep.

I woke up about an hour ago and I really wish I was still asleep.  My whole body is aching, my muscles feel really sore and tender, I just moved my head to the right and wow, my neck hurts a lot.  The only way I can describe it is to compare it to doing a hard work out at the gym and the next day you ache like a bitch and your all stiff.  Even my stomach muscles are hurting - it does literally feel like I've done a thousand sit ups at the gym.  I used to think I must do a work out in my sleep.  Unfortunately I don't - I would be a lot more toned if I did!

Me in bed with my hot water bottle (his name is bertie) 

I was hoping to go out for a nice pub lunch today with Sami but I'll probably stay put with my hot water bottle.  Not sure, I'll see how I feel in a couple of hours.  Sometimes I do just get on with it - I can be very stubborn and I wont let it stop me doing what I want to do but other  times I give in.  I'm not sure which one it will be yet.

Sami just offered me breakfast but when I'm in this much pain I don't really feel like eating.  When the pain is this bad it makes me feel sick. =(

As I'm typing I can feel the muscles in my arms going into spasm and it freaking hurts!  I feel like a herd of elephants trampled on me in the night.

I don't know what to do with myself. 

The thing about these flare ups is you never know how long they are going to last.  It can be a day or months.  I've had about  4 days off from it since Christmas.  I am used to it now.  For me when I have a 'good day' it's probably a normal persons idea of a bad day.  I just have a new normal now.

Well I don't really know what else to say - I can't really think at the moment.  I just wanted to write this whilst I'm having a bad time so that it's a true account of what its like to live with a painful illness.  I hope I'm not coming across as a moaning myrtle but if I am then I don't care because I'm in too much pain to be bothered!

I hope you all have a great and pain free Sunday!

Lots of love

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