Christ on a bike! I am writing this whilst in bed as I am in a lot of pain of today. Shit bitch its bad today.
I had a great day yesterday, one of my best friends, Lexie came over and we went out for dinner. It was lovely and chilled and we had a really nice evening. I got home a little after 10 and went to bed about 12 - I was absolutely fine all day until I got into bed.
Desert last night....mmmmm
The pain came out of nowhere - I had really sharp, shooting pains going down my legs and into my feet, my head was pounding and my muscles violently spasming. Sami was asleep so I just laid there pathetically whimpering. I considered taking pain killers but I take so many tablets everyday that I usually reserve them for when the pain is really severe. I managed to get to sleep but I've probably had about 2 hours. The pain was waking me up and the night sweats were pretty bad. Its very strange because I don't sweat or get hot in the day, it's only when I sleep.
I woke up about an hour ago and I really wish I was still asleep. My whole body is aching, my muscles feel really sore and tender, I just moved my head to the right and wow, my neck hurts a lot. The only way I can describe it is to compare it to doing a hard work out at the gym and the next day you ache like a bitch and your all stiff. Even my stomach muscles are hurting - it does literally feel like I've done a thousand sit ups at the gym. I used to think I must do a work out in my sleep. Unfortunately I don't - I would be a lot more toned if I did!
Me in bed with my hot water bottle (his name is bertie)
I was hoping to go out for a nice pub lunch today with Sami but I'll probably stay put with my hot water bottle. Not sure, I'll see how I feel in a couple of hours. Sometimes I do just get on with it - I can be very stubborn and I wont let it stop me doing what I want to do but other times I give in. I'm not sure which one it will be yet.
Sami just offered me breakfast but when I'm in this much pain I don't really feel like eating. When the pain is this bad it makes me feel sick. =(
As I'm typing I can feel the muscles in my arms going into spasm and it freaking hurts! I feel like a herd of elephants trampled on me in the night.
I don't know what to do with myself.
The thing about these flare ups is you never know how long they are going to last. It can be a day or months. I've had about 4 days off from it since Christmas. I am used to it now. For me when I have a 'good day' it's probably a normal persons idea of a bad day. I just have a new normal now.
Well I don't really know what else to say - I can't really think at the moment. I just wanted to write this whilst I'm having a bad time so that it's a true account of what its like to live with a painful illness. I hope I'm not coming across as a moaning myrtle but if I am then I don't care because I'm in too much pain to be bothered!
I hope you all have a great and pain free Sunday!
Lots of love
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