Tuesday evening -
Ok so I left work early, came home and since I've got in I've pretty much sat on the sofa wailing like a banshee. A crazy banshee at that. I'm really surprised I haven't had a knock on the door from the RSPCA looking for a distressed animal. I am in so much pain. This is ridiculous. I keep feeling dizzy too and I'm exhausted.
I am currently contemplating downing either a bottle of wine, a bottle of baileys or a bottle of bleach. The bleach is the most appealing right now but I've just spoken to my mum and she has advised against the bleach. She advised the wine. I said, 'But mum its only 4pm' She said well in these circumstances its OK. I decided to wait till 6pm. Seems a bit more acceptable somehow. The wine worked. It relaxed my muscles and helped a lot. I'm still in pain but no where near as bad. I'd prefer a glass of vino over pain killers any day (does that sound Irish?) I don't like pain killers.
Sami came home from work with flowers...he is the best. So thoughtful.
He cooked dinner too. We had steak with potatoes and veg and I now have a dodgy tummy. I've had to run to the loo about 4 times in the space of an hour and I doubt it was Sami's cooking. Like I said before, my body hates me. It is a case of, 'Which way can we destroy Faye today?' and today it was extreme pain and exhaustion followed by a bout of diarrhea for good measure. I mean why not?
I'm now in bed (after Sami ran me a bath) God he's almost too good to be true isn't he? I've decided I'm not going to work tomorrow I'm going to rest. We'll see if it makes a difference.....
Hiii! So I've had a nice long lay in and I'm feeling good. No pain or anything. My eye is a bit sore again and I have a little cyst in the corner and I've still got a dodgy tummy but apart from that I'm feeling good.
Sounds quite bad doesn't it that I've got a sore eye and dodgy stomach but I'd still describe myself as feeling good! Well in comparison to yesterday I feel amazing!!
This definitely goes to show I'm making the right decision in giving up work.
I used to keep a diary of my symptoms - I'd literally just put a few words like:
and one day I went back over it all (about 6months worth) and it made me cry because there was something EVERYDAY. Not one day was it blank. I stopped doing it after that.
It's my friend Tom's birthday on Saturday and we're meant to be going out in Soho (I love Soho) so I'm hoping I can go....I just bought a new dress - a pretty white one. Then I realised white was probably not the best option as I'm really pale at the moment. And blotchy - I look like corned beef with a face.
Is it corned beef? Is it Faye?
I need to go and get a spray tan but I had one before and it looked awful....it was actually quite horrific. So I'm not sure what to do. Can't go on a sunbed because that will cause a flare up, so I'm not sure, maybe I'll just rock the dress and be like 'Yeah I'm pale, so what!'