Ok so I'm now in the desperation zone or the 'I can't take it anymore' zone. Yep. I tried hard not go down that road but I knew I was on my way. I tried to resist but unfortunately after 72 hours of relentless and severe pain that is where I've ended up.
Sami went to the docs to pick up my pain killers for me (they gave him a prescription for 100 tramadol so that should last me a week. Lol) and came back with 2 massive chocolate bars and some shitey mags and brought me tea in bed. He really is the best. He always cheers me up and makes me feel better. I felt all soppy and mushy so naturally I had to do a facebook status to declare my undying love for him.
Today (Tuesday 22 October 2013) continued from yesterday
I fell asleep with my phone in my hand (in the middle of blogging) without finishing so I'll just carry on from today...
I'm writing this after my second nap of the day (its 11.45am) and I still feel tired. I've had really bad night sweats so I really need to get in the bath but I don't have the energy! I woke up about 6 times covered in sweat. Yuk! I can't stand the night sweats they're truly awful. I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy.
Sometimes I wonder how I'm supposed to cope with all this. For most people pain is only temporary but for me it feels like its constant. Pain is just part of my daily life now and I really do wonder how I'm still sane. Well sort of sane.
I recently found out that you can always see your nose but your brain chooses to ignore it. I hope one day my brain will choose to ignore my pain! That would be amazing. C'mon brain let's do this!
I'm really conscious of my nose now!
Its now 3pm - I had a bath in between writing this and the bath did make me feel better but I'm still in agony. I'm going to take some tramadol and go into a nice little tramadol haze.
I haven't achieved anything today. This makes me sad =0(. I've got a huge pile of ironing, a washing machine full of washing, the hoovering needs to be done, the bathroom could do with a scrub and I need to change the bed covers but instead I'm sitting here watching Julian Clary on Piers Morgan's Life Stories. Why am I watching this?? Urgh! I feel like such a slob.
Before I go into my tramadol haze I'm going to attempt to do some washing and change the bed covers. Then I can get back in a nice clean, fresh bed. Ahhh I love that feeling.
I'm falling asleep. G'night for the third time today. X
It's 5pm and I'm awake again - lovely nap that was. I managed (with quite a struggle) to change the duvet cover and I've put some washing on (go me) so now I have achieved something today. Such a small thing but giving myself a pat on the back for such things is part of how I keep sane - you have to be kind to yourself. Oooh and I'm going to cook a sausage casserole. Hmmm, actually I've achieved quite a lot today in between all the sleeping and moaning.
I'm feeling a little better so hopefully I'll be out the other side of this flare soon before I have a breakdown.
Its now 9pm and I'm going to bed. Sami's watching the footy and after a little jaunt on instagram I'm bored, I'm aching and I'm fed up. I've cooked the dinner and done the washing. My work here is done.
My Sausage Casserole:
not bad considering I'm only using one arm at the moment.
G'night for the fourth time today. I hope to feel better tomorrow and if I don't I'm going to hibernate for the winter and will be back in touch by spring.