18 Nov 2013

Slap me with a wet fish!

Saturday 16 November 2013

After a hellish week (I actually thought I died and woke up in hell at one point) I'm feeling loads better. I woke up on Thursday and felt great so ended up getting loads of housework done which also made me feel better and Lexie came over in the evening for dinner. All in all a good day and it felt good to be back to 'normal'.

I felt good yesterday too but decided not to do anything. I ordered a onesie on Thursday which arrived yesterday afternoon. I love it! It is seriously awesome! I bought it because apparently we have the coldest winter ever on its way and I wanted to be prepared (you can tell I was in The Cubs). I sat around in it (being fabulous) all day and in the evening Sami and I went to a pub in Wimbledon for our friend Jenny's birthday. We got home about 12.30am and I got straight back in the onesie! I'm scared I'll never take it off.

Here's me in my onesie....(it's a little bit big)

Look how happy I am

Today I'm going bridesmaid dress shopping with Ela - hopefully we'll finally find something. Its turning into a bit of a nightmare! My figure is all out of proportion and I'm very short so it hasn't been easy to find something that fits. I have big boobs and no hips! Grrr. Ela's wedding is in February so we don't have much time left.

After bridesmaid shopping I'm gonna come home and yes, get in my onesie! Thankfully I don't have plans to go out tonight - the besties gonna come round for steak and chips. Mmm steak and chips....

Sami's gone to Yeovil for a boys weekend (the boys being his house-mates from uni) so I've got the flat to myself. He goes on these boys weekends maybe 4 times a year but 2 of the lads now have babies so the weekends aren't as often as they used to be. Sometimes the wives and girlfriends go along too - usually camping which I hate!!! Why do people enjoy camping? Wtf is up with that? The last time we all went I told them its the last time. Its not for me. Anyway this time round its just the boys and they're staying at Phil's house so I'll be in bed alone tonight. Poor me.

Sami and I are one of those annoying couples that do everything together but I do think its good to have time apart. The longest we've ever been apart was when Sami went to America (with the boys) for 3 weeks. I missed him so much it hurt! At the time we'd been together around 6 months and it was then I realised I wanted to marry Sami and never be away from him for that long again. And now we are getting married! Yey!

I know I keep going on about it but this onesie is so cosy. I feel so content! I'm in bed, I've got a coffee, the heating on, I'm not in pain today and I'm the comfiest person ever. #lifeisgood!

If you ever feel down just buy a onesie.

I am a little hungover today actually, although I'm not sure why as I only had 4 beers! #lightweight. Must learn to limit alcohol intake.

Right, I'm off to get washed and dressed. Bridesmaid shopping!


Bridesmaid dress shopping wasn't successful. The nightmare continues!!! I got home and back into the onesie and Sil came round armed with wine. We drank the flat dry and didn't go to bed until around 4am. Whoopsie! Must learn to limit alcohol intake.

Needless to say I'm slightly delicate today but overall I feel fine. All I've done all day is eat. I made myself a big cooked breakfast and when Sami got home I cooked us a huge paella with chicken, chorizo and prawns. Om nom nom. Love cosy sundays and stuffing my face.

I've been thrown out of the living room and made to watch TV in the bedroom. Sami couldn't handle anymore of my shows. First I watched Come Dine With Me then strictly come dancing followed by the X-Factor and when I put I'm a celebrity get me out of here on Sami couldn't take anymore. Sunday TV is the best!!! We usually spend Sundays at Sami's Dads so wouldn't usually watch all those things. Never mind I'm sure I've watched football enough times to make it ok.

So tomorrow I have no plans. What will I do? If I'm feeling ok I might clean the inside of the oven. Its not filthy but I haven't given it a thorough clean for a few weeks. We'll see. I should get out more really but I hate the cold, It makes me hurt. That reminds me, apparently we have the worst winter ever on its way. I'm scared! I've heard we're going to have 100 days of snow and its going to be much colder than usual. I'm seriously considering hibernation - I reckon I could do it easily. I've just realised I'd already mentioned the coldest winter ever is on its way! Bloody Lupus brain fog.

I love and hate winter. I love the feeling of being cosy, I love X-mas, I love snow, I love hot chocolate and marshmallows, snuggling by the fireplace, comfort food, wearing my onesie (not sure if I've mentioned that?) But I hate how the cold affects me now. Its like it gets in my body and beats me up. Plus everyone gets colds/viruses etc so I just end up constantly ill plus my Lupus gets worse in the cold so its a good thing I enjoy snuggling up really. At least I'm not one of those people who enjoys 'doing stuff' like rock climbing and hiking and stuff. I enjoy sitting down, eating and drinking wine.


Great. I've woken up with a sore throat, massive and painful glands in my neck, my ear hurts and I'm aching all over. Obvs some kind of cold or something.  When you have Lupus and you get a virus or a cold etc it makes the Lupus flare up so not only do I have a cold to contend with I also have a flare up.

Imagine how rotten you feel when you have flu - headache, nauseous, exhausted, aches and pains etc now imagine you've also been beaten up with a baseball bat. That's my life on a daily basis. Now throw in a cold to that mix and that's my life today. At least I have my onesie. Its gonna be one of those days.

I wrote all that at about 9am this morning, fell asleep and now its 2pm! Whoooops!! I just rang my Mum and she said she too has a sore throat and has struggled to stay awake. Lexie text me earlier and said she'd been sent home from work and my friend Amy put a status on facebook saying she has a sore throat so I reckon we've all got the same bug. Even now I'm finding it hard to stay awake.  Hate feeling like this - I haven't achieved anything today. I planned to clean the oven and all sorts! By the time I've had a bath and tidied up a bit it will be time to get dinner on. What a waste of a day!

I just had a bath and for some reason came over all sorry for myself. I was laying there thinking about how often I feel unwell compared to how often I feel OK  and it suddenly hit me that I will have Lupus and all the other things I have for the rest of my life. The.Rest.Of.My.Life. I feel really sad. I used to have so much energy and be so full of life. Now I'm like an old granny that can't even stay awake a whole day. Wow my life has changed so much.

OK, someone slap me with a wet fish and tell me to get a grip! Jeez Louise I can't be going down the feeling sorry for myself road. That's not a good route to take on this journey and a miserable face doesn't suit me. Right I'm gonna get up, make a cup of tea and think about all the reasons why I'm lucky.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

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