14 May 2014

Candy Floss Brain

8-9 May 2014

Let me start by apologising for not blogging for a long time.  I haven't really been able to due to some tragic circumstances in my family and in one of my closest friend's families.  Due to these circumstances I felt like I couldn't blog without mentioning what had happened but at the same time, I didn't feel it was my place to publicly write about so I just went for the good ol' burying my head in the sand.  I'm sorry to be cryptic (I hate that shit) but I'll have to leave it there.

Anyway I'm back now and busier than ever.  I've recently got back from my best friend's hen do which was rather awesome if I do say so myself.  We went to Brighton from Friday - Monday and basically partied for 3 days and nights.  I was knackered when we got home on Monday afternoon - I sat on the sofa and stayed there till around 10pm and I'm pretty sure I didn't move a muscle. Sami went on the stag do in Budapest and got back late Sunday night so we both just sat there hugging, completely drained.  God knows what the boys got up to in Buda - I don't even want to know.  Us girls go up to quite a lot anyway ;0)

The week leading up to the hen do was rough - I had to use my walking stick and all sorts, luckily I pulled through and was fine for the weekend.  I'm sure all the alcohol and fun helped!

I can't believe my bestest friend in the whole wide world is getting married in less than two weeks.  I'm so excited - I well up every time I think about it and she's marrying such a nice bloke.  Yeeeyyyy.  Funny how we are both getting married in the same year.  We're funny like that - we do everything together. Haha.  Aaaah so excited.

I loved the hen do and I'm so glad it all went well and my best friend had a great time but I'm glad it's over now as I can go back to concentrating on my wedding which is only 5 months away! Shit-a-brick! Planning the hen do was fun but I told her she's not allowed to get married again!  It's all back to normal now and I've finally got my wedding invites ordered today - what a long process that is! Jaysus Christ! Can't I just send out a facebook invite?  That would be so much easier.

We've finally booked our honeymoon! After months of deliberation we decided on a an amazing hotel in Mauritius.  We just couldn't decide and as a very decisive person it was driving me nuts but booking your honeymoon is a big deal and we wanted to get it right.    Sami's Mum's husband found it for us and after having a look we fell in love with it and went ahead and booked it.  Only thing is, we are flying out the day after the wedding which is a tiny bit sooner than I wanted but they only fly out on Sundays so we just went for it.  I'm sure it will be fine.

I've done so much since I last blogged but I won't bore you all with all the ins and outs but I will tell you what I've got  coming up -

We've got a wedding in France in June (can't wait) I've never been to the South of France so I'm looking forward to wine tasting and all of that (French) jazz.  The bride has arranged for all of her wedding guests to stay in a chateaux so Sami, me and our friend Tom are going for a week.  There's gonna be a pool party, bbq, pub quiz and of course the wedding so I think it's going to be brilliant.  I feel very lucky to be having two holidays this year.  Very lucky indeed.

After this wedding we have a break from weddings for 3 months which will be quite nice as we've had a wedding or a hen/stag do every month for the past 2 years, which is mental.  Sami and I are the last ones out of our immediate group of friends so by the time our wedding comes around everyone will be sick of them!  I'm certain most people are already sick of me banging on about it! I even talk to strangers about it - cabbies, people in the doctors, people on the bus, hairdressers, the old tramp down the road....ok maybe not the tramp down the road but most people I come into contact with will know all of my plans.  I'm super excited as well as super broody.  I'm not sure how much longer I can continue to feel like this - it's almost physical. Honestly, my womb actually contracts at the sight of a cute baby (only the cute ones, not the Winston Churchill looking ones) but seriously it does.  I need a pug or a baby soon.  Sami said no to both...for now.  As soon as we are in a position to sell this place and buy somewhere bigger I'm getting a pug or a brussels griffon (or both) so hopefully we can move in a year or so.  We'll see.  For now I'll just have to continue crying at One Born Every Minute and going all weird when I see a cute baby.


Wednesday (I think?) 14 May 2014

Hey guys, I'm sat here writing this in a very odd position indeed - I'm sat up ultra straight with a bean bag around my neck and I'm not able to move my head left or right, not even slightly.  Basically I fell asleep on Saturday night and thought I must have slept in a funny position as when I woke up on Sunday I was in so much pain I couldn't move.  I couldn't get up and when I tried to, I screamed with pain. I was like 'Eh? What the feck have I done to myself?'  Seriously, what am I like?

I've hurt my neck by sleeping funny before and not been able to move it for a day or so but it's never hurt like this.  I literally spent most of Sunday crying in pain (oh poor me) and as someone that suffers with a lot of pain, it rarely makes me cry but this pain is ridiculous.  I felt awful all day Sunday, I didn't sleep well at all so felt like shite on Monday and today is Wednesday and I still feel like a hung-over 90 year old with a dodgy neck.  I decided the neck pain is actually a result of Lupus or fibromyalgia as its the same kind of pain I get in my elbows and knees when I have a flare up, plus I've been feeling overwhelmingly tired and like my brain isn't working properly.  Lupus brain fog is so weird - it's like your brain goes all fuzzy.  It's taking me ages to type as I keep forgetting how to spell words or what I was about to write and speaking is hard too. Once I've finished this I'm gonna take some potent pain killers and get in my bed. Wooo! Party for one!

As well as not really being able to move my head without excruciating pain, I'm also on fire.  Yep, I'm on fire.  Well my skin is so hot I reckon you could cook an egg on my chest.  Lupus is on a rampage today!

Here's me earlier on today with my microwaveable bean bag which helps the neck pain a lot - the heat is amazing although I'm still no impressed with this pain that seems to be ...I've forgotten the word I wanted to use...well it's non stop basically....that wasn't the word I wanted though. Arrrghhh! SO FRUSTRATING.

I've called the bean bag 'Billy Small Balls the Bean Bag'.  Yep it's got a name. All this medication is getting to me.

And here's me now, I've developed a rash this eveningv- it's also on my knees and my back - its just like sunburn and it fucking hurts like sunburn.


And here's a pic I made last year but it sums me up this week ( I thought I was so funny when I first thought of this) haha

I don't really have much else to say as I can't think....I was going to write about something but it's gone now and I've no idea what it was! Oh well.  I'll be back when I'm more with it and my brain isn't like candy floss.

 my brain

Relentless! That was the word I was after! Wahoooo Relentless!

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