HOW TO BE HUNGOVER …
1) Once awake,
check phone and photos.
2) Check
Facebook. Cringe, panic maybe even cry.
3) Roll over,
consider calling an ambulance. This headache is NOT normal! My brain must
be swollen. Ohmygod I’m not hungover, I’m actually dying.
4) Drink
water. You have got to relieve the cotton wool mouth. And what the
hell? Did the poo fairy come along in the night and take a dump in my mouth?
5) HOP – hang
over poo. Gross but c'mon we’ve all been there.
6) Contemplate
eating. This will either be very appealing or make you vom. If it
is appealing, eat something that involves bacon. If it’s not appealing
eat toast and drink flat lemonade – yes it really is the cure for everything.
7) Drink a can
of cold, very fizzy, full fat coke. It’s the one.
8) Try to get
sympathy/someone to look after you. Failing that go back to bed for a
while – sleep this shit off.
9) Under no
circumstances do you get dressed. It’s the law to stay in your
PJ’s. Being hungover is not too dissimilar to being poorly.
10) Once you have
slept it off, call everyone you were out with and make sure you’re still
friends….and get their version of events. Wow those photos make sense
now.
Please drink responsibly.
Wow so true!
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